This blog post can be found at LD Parents

http://ldparents.blogspot.com/2009/05/shaky-hands.html

Around the time my son started to talk, his speech therapist noticed that his hands trembled whenever he tried to color with crayons, drink from a cup, put food in his mouth or grasp small objects. An MRI showed everything was fine and we were told that these hand tremors or what we called, “shaky hands,” were here to stay.

I quickly accepted that my son probably would never become a neurosurgeon but I didn’t realize the effect that poor fine motor skills and “shaky hands” would have in the classroom. Writing is tiring and mostly illegible. Over the past 10 years, the schools have tried to help and I’ve sought help from outside professionals but the problems persist and handwriting remains his biggest obstacle in the classroom.

Poor Handwriting (dysgraphia)

What’s worked – Using an AlphaSmart or small portable keyboard. I bought him one in third grade, he’s now in sixth and he’s finally accepting that it’s his friend. (www.alphasmart.com)

What hasn’t – A well-meaning occupational therapist with the school district tried placing a weight on his wrist to steady the shaking. It didn’t work at all and was painful! She also tried a contraption made of string that made him hold the pencil differently, also ineffective and very distracting.
 
TO READ THE REST OF THIS BLOG POST, PLEASE GO TO
http://ldparents.blogspot.com/2009/05/shaky-hands.html

The blog post can be found at the Can Mom Be Calm blog

http://canmombecalm.blogspot.com/2009/09/good-friends-are-hard-to-find.html

This summer, I was on a mission. At least I started out that way and like some of my “missions,” it sort of fizzled into almost nothing but as the summer fades, my laziness goes with it and I’m reviving some of my goals.

One of them was to make friends for my kids. I really feel the need to make more socialization opportunities for Logan and Spencer. After all, that was one of the reasons I quit my job. When I was working, getting playdates for Logan was a lost cause. I think there were many reasons behind it. Some parents didn’t want nannies to have playdates. Some parents didn’t want other people’s children in their homes when they weren’t there. Moreover, no mom wanted to have a playdate with a nanny. The only time it was possible for me to have a playdate for Logan was during the weekend and of course, those were always spur-of-the-moment and skills could not be practiced on a consistent basis.

I quit my job when my kids entered the world of special needs services but unfortunately, it was still hard to get playdates for my kids. It was great to have special services for the kids but therapy takes time and keeps you locked up at home or a clinic. Moreover, Logan (and soon Spencer) goes to a special ed school and so he is not able to go to school with kids in the neighborhood. Furthermore, time spent on the bus, something neighborhood kids don’t do, means less time in the neighborhood playground where he could be making and keeping friendships.

TO READ THE REST OF THIS BLOG POST ON SOCIALIZATION, PLEASE GO TO http://canmombecalm.blogspot.com/2009/09/good-friends-are-hard-to-find.html

http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/

If you want help in keeping things in perspective on your life and challenges, read Melody’s blog – she is truly amazing!

Melody

A mom by birth and adoption shares – through photography, writing and humor – parenting boys who live with autism, ADHD, cerebral palsy, fetal alcohol spectrum disorder and more. Reminding everyone that children with special needs are kids.

Why I Blog…

My special purpose sons take me to places daily in mind and heart that I would have never known existed without them. In sharing photos and a few words from our daily life, I encourage you to look at your life with humor, hope and the reality that you do what you can do when you can do it.

A sample posting:

http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/05/love-thursday-special.html

Love Thursday ~ Special

I look at this child of mine and see so much more than you.

I see his pain. His intense struggles. His once physically abused and broken body.

His kind, forgiving spirit. His acceptance of difference.

His heart that loves so, so deeply.

Friday morning at an unbelievably early hour our family, including Grandma, will head to our State’s summer Special Olympics.

And…

Wil will be swimming the 25m and 50m freestyle events.

It is his first time competing in anything other than daily scuffles with his brothers.

He’s a bit nervous.

And way psyched.

This beautiful soul…our miracle child…has overcome so much. He has struggled, persisted and accomplished things the experts said would not be possible.

We are so proud of him.

We are so blessed by him.

We love him beyond measure.

I assure you that all love and GO WIL! you send this way will be enthusiastically received and deeply appreciated by a special eleven year old boy.

http://canmombecalm.blogspot.com

Jennifer Choi has two special needs kids. Her blog posts are written in a compelling manner that shares a tremendous amount of information and wisdom. Her writing is thoughtful, information, emotional yet not dominated by emotion, if you know what I mean. She is a really terrific resource! Check her out!

Jennifer Choi

About Me

Last year, while on maternity leave with my second baby, my oldest son, Logan, then 3, went from being very withdrawn in preschool to very aggressive and was about to be expelled! After getting him evaluated, I soon found myself quitting my job as a publicist and a few months later, I realized I had not one but two children with special needs with issues like hyperactivity, impulsivity, difficulty feeding, speech delays, some oppositional behavior and sensory processing disorder. I promised myself I would tackle this problem like the way I did my job. I would map out my plan and beat it down. I immersed myself in learning things like SPD, ADHD, and gluten/casein free diets. Last year, I checked myself in the emergency room with chest pains and difficulty breathing. It took awhile to figure it out but finally I was diagnosed: panic episodes. I wasn’t beating anything. It was beating me. Well, no more. I want to be happy. I want my kids to get better. I want my marriage to be strong. I know I can do this. I just have to be calm and take it one step at a time.

SAMPLE BLOG POST:

The original post can be found at http://canmombecalm.blogspot.com/2009/06/pr-backlash-of-supreme-court-victory.html

PR Backlash of the Supreme Court “Victory”

When I was in my twenties, I was very involved with my identity as a Korean American woman. It was a really big deal to me. I worked for a women’s organization that was run by Korean American women and for a couple of years, we set up conferences that discussed issues that affected us as Asians and as women.

In many ways, being an Asian American woman was a double blow. As Asians, we dealt with a plethora of stereotypes: complacent nerds, Harvard bound math geniuses, sleazy Chinatown gangsters, and perpetual foreigners despite being raised or even born in the U.S. (Do you know how many times I’ve been asked where I’m from and after I say “New York,” the person says, “No, where are you really from?”)

As Asian American women, our stereotype paints us as super-submissive rugs to step on and/or exotic sex kittens. We are marginalized by mainstream American society and we are also marginalized by our male Asian counterparts. There is a reason that you see so many Asian women married to non-Asian men. I know some men have fetishes for Asian women but there is another side to it. Some Asian women sometimes have a hard time dealing with the double standards of Asian men and so they naturally fall in love with men who are not unfair and selfish. (BTW, not all Asian American men are like this- many are really great to their wives.)

I bring this up today because I read something disturbing after doing the happy dance upon hearing the recent Supreme court ruling that says that parents can ask for tuition reimbursement for a private special education school even if they never had their child in a public special education setting. Jen Laviano, a special education lawyer wrote an insightful blog post lamenting how the evening news covered the story in a way that focused more on the costs implicated in the ruling. If you want to hear some dissenting lay opinions, read the comments on Sue Shellenbarger’s blog in the Wall Street Journal. Words like “retard,” “reform school,” “hood,” and “flipping burgers at McDonald’s” were used by commenters. It wasn’t pretty.

Any special needs parent knows that the cost spent now will mean a lot less spent later. It could also result in a great contribution to society. They also know that a child placed in an inappropriate educational setting will negatively impact the child’s classmates’ opportunity to learn as well. But here’s the problem: only the parents of special needs families know this. Possibly included in this circle are the teachers who teach these classes and parents of the special needs child’s classmates who are aware that the child is negatively impacting their own child’s education. If we are lucky, the teacher and the other parents will recognize the child has special needs. If we aren’t, the child and his parents will be painted with numerous assumptions which would be hurtful, not to mention counter-productive.
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