Summertime.  A time to be carefree;  a free spirit; a new world explorer.  Or maybe not.

Our son loves to be home.  Given his choice, he would stay home pretty much most of the time — in his pajamas with his hair all messy and toys all around him.  He doesn’t, of course.  He is usually pretty busy between school, sports, OT and so forth.  However, we have had a two week break between the end of school and before summer camp starts.  Getting him out of the house with the babysitter has been a real challenge.

Don’t get me wrong.  In general, the babysitter situation, as I wrote in my last post, is working out well.  We hired a 17 year old boy and our son loves playing soccer, basketball and XBOX with him.  This is good.  However, he does not want to leave the house to go to the playground, or to the batting cages or to the YMCA pool.  I attribute this to his being uncomfortable with anything new which I think is part of his cognitive rigidity aspect of ADHD.  It is difficult for our son to face new situations and changes.

My approach to this has been twofold.  First, try to get a good friend to do the activity with him.  The idea being that a good friend provides our son with the comfortable framework that he needs.  Secondly, I strongly encourage him to try the activity (encourage might be a bit euphemistic) and tell him that if he does like not the activity then, after he tries it, he can come home.  Usually he then goes and has a great time!!

We go through this for every new activity.  It is frustrating, it is annoying and it makes me sad that it is often so difficult for him.  I remember my summer days of free flowing play and exploration and wish that things could be easier for our son.

I often question myself on whether he is just being a homebody or is it a form of anxiety/cognitive rigidity?    My mother’s instinct tells me that it is his anxiety.  And so we soldier on trying to think of new ways to make him comfortable enough to try new activities, situations and sports.  It is a daily battle that I wish was not a battle for him at all.

Do you face a similar situation?  How do you handle it?  Any ideas for me and for others would be greatly appreciated!!

Until next time …. Take care!!

Karen

BED TIME. Does reading these two words give you nightmares as a parent of a child with ADHD? Apparently it is VERY common for children with ADHD (and adults with ADHD too) to resist bed time. It is a nightly challenge for us in our household.
When thinking about ADHD and sleep, it might be helpful to think what I call the 4 stages of sleep:

• Bed time
• Falling asleep
• Staying asleep
• Waking up

Bed time for children with ADHD is challenging because, well, they often just don’t want to stop. However, once in bed, many children and adults with ADHD have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep and then, once asleep, waking up. According to research, prior to puberty 10-15% of children with ADHD have trouble getting to sleep. This is 2x the rate found in children and adolescents who do not have ADHD. The number of individuals with ADHD experiencing trouble getting to sleep dramatically increases with age (oh joy – another thing to look forward to!):

• 50% of children with ADHD have difficulty falling asleep almost every night by age 12 ½
• By age 30, more than 70% of adults with ADHD report that they spend more than 1 hour trying to fall asleep at night

Yikes!! [These figures were found in the February/March 2004 issue of Additude in an article written by William Dobson M.D. entitled, “ADHD Sleep Advice – End Bedtime Battles”.]

Fortunately for us, our son does not have trouble sleeping once we actually get him settled down into bed. It is bed time, itself, that is our challenge right now. So what helps us with bed time?

• Routine, routine, routine – routine is our best friend. We are probably our own worst enemy because on the weekends, we do not stick to the routine but a routine associated with bed time and a routine on the time itself have helped tremendously.
• One on one time with parents – our son still loves to cuddle with mom and dad. Nothing calms him down faster than when we lay down with him and cuddle. We chat quietly about our day and have a few quiet laughs, hugs and kisses. I don’t know if it is the sense of security, the routine or the cuddling that calms him down but it works for us.

Other suggestions for bed time settling down and falling asleep include:

• Turning off the TV and shutting down video games about an hour before bed time. TV and video stimulate all childrens’ nervous systems – imagine what it does to the nervous system of a child with ADHD.
• Avoiding caffeine before bed time. Not only is caffeine a stimulant but it is also a diuretic. Nothing worse than trying to sleep when you really need to pee!
• Having milk and ice cream. Dairy foods contain an amino acid that converts the active ingredients in milk to melatonin and serotonin. Both melatonin and serotonin help the body fall asleep.
• Practicing deep breathing. Practice releasing the tensions, energy and worries from the day and preparing for sleep through deep breathing.
• Taking Melatonin.
• Taking a bedtime medication prescribed by your doctor.
• Using sensory products such as weighted blankets or special tents that give a sense of security.
• Playing nature sound CDs, meditation CDs, white noise or calming music.
• Drinking “Organic Nighty Night” tea (we have actually used this) or other types of soothing teas.
• De-cluttering the child’s room to limit distractions.
• Taking a warm bathes or shower.
• Using lavender in the child’s room to calm.
• Making sure the child has plenty of exercise throughout the day.
• Behavior therapy.

Hopefully within this list you will find some ideas to help you and your child to find a bed time routine which results in a smooth transition from an awake state to an asleep state! (Is there such a thing as a smooth transition with a child with ADHD?)

Trouble with staying asleep is a whole other issue. I would examine food and exercise habits but also consult a doctor to make sure other conditions like sleep apnea or restless leg syndrome are not impeding a good night’s rest.

I tend to believe that having trouble waking up is probably correlated to the earlier phases of sleep like having trouble falling asleep or staying asleep. We definitely have trouble waking our son up some mornings but it is usually when he is tired. He needs more sleep towards the end of the week versus the beginning of the week because he works so hard at school and at home with homework. We give him a hot shower every morning and wrap him in warm towels when he gets out of the shower (wouldn’t it be nice if we all could have warm towels in the morning) and that helps him in waking up!

In the academic world, the correlation between ADHD and sleep disorders is one which needs to be further explored. What is known is that sleep problems are rampant in people who have ADHD. However, the big unanswered question is whether sleep problems are secondary to having ADHD or whether sleep disorders are another cause of ADHD. Right now, there is no answer. What is known is that the proper amount of sleep is important for anyone. Children with ADHD, however, need their sleep even more because the lack of sleep can make a life that is challenging even more so.

I hope this article is helpful in giving you some ideas to try in establishing a way to help your child transition more peacefully from being awake to being asleep.

As always, take care …. Until next time.
Karen

One of the challenges associated with ADHD and ADD is “executive functioning”. I have talked about this before. This like so many other things is a confusing element to ADHD but one that I feel is really important to be aware of and necessary to understand the challenges of your child holistically. In fact, many experts in the field of ADHD/ADD are starting to suggest that ADHD be re-conceptualized as an “executive disorder” and deemphasize the focus on hyperactivity and attention. Problems with executive functioning are not limited, however, to only those with ADHD or ADD. Executive dysfunction sometimes is the only problem and sometimes is part of a larger problem.

The easiest way to think of executive functioning is that it is the administrative or managerial part of the human brain. Executive functioning has to do with organization, planning, self-control, and time management, for instance. Like anything else, any individual with executive functioning issues will have areas of strength and areas of weakness within the broad spectrum of executive functioning.
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From: http://thepealfamily.blogspot.com

Becky
I am… wife to a wonderful husband, mother to 2 awesome boys, daughter to fabulous parents, sister to 2 phenomenal women, friend to many… and a child of God.

Do They Know?

http://thepealfamily.blogspot.com/2009/09/do-they-know.html

The other day, as I was watching all the kids get on the school bus outside our front door, I dreamed about having a “normal” kid… a kid who gets themselves ready in the morning without 100 reminders or redirections… a kid who does their homework without complaining and completes it in a normal amount of time… a kid who doesn’t have a meltdown every time he doesn’t get his way… and the list goes on and on.

Then I wondered… Do they know?

Do the other parents know what we go through on a daily basis, just to get ready for school?
Do the other parents know what we go through every night when we have to do homework?
Do they realize how good they really have it? Do they appreciate their kids?

I love my kids with all my heart and I wouldn’t trade them for the world… but some days I just wish for some semblance of normalcy. What is our “normal” you may ask – here are just a few glimpses of what it is like to be a parent of a kid with ADHD:

- Simple tasks like getting dressed, making a bed, or brushing their teeth require numerous reminders and redirections and it takes 10 times longer than it should.
- Sometimes I just help them get dressed, eventhough they can do it by themselves, just so that it won’t take so long.

Read the rest of this entry at: http://thepealfamily.blogspot.com/2009/09/do-they-know.html

The Website: www.totallyadd.com
The Film: http://news.globaltv.com/Loving/2009300/story.html

Description of the Film from the totallyadd.com website. The description can be found at: http://totallyadd.com/about/the-film/

ADD & Loving It?! is a refreshing, witty and inspiring documentary about adult Attention Deficit Disorder (also known as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD). The one-hour film, which will be broadcast on Canwest Global Television in the fall, is hosted by actor/comedian Patrick McKenna and written, produced and directed by fellow comedian, Rick Green.

ADD & Loving It?! explores and explains the disorder by following Patrick’s journey for a diagnosis so he can confirm what he’s always suspected – that he has ADD. Along the way, Patrick and his wife Janis open up about their challenges and struggles, something Janis admits “we’ve spent our whole lives trying to hide.”

Patrick notes, “Some people think the diagnosis is the kiss of death, while others think there’s no such thing; it’s nothing, it’s all made up.” But after talking with the experts and with ordinary people, as well as drawing from his own experience, he confirms that ADD is real. It’s genetic, it can destroy lives, and adults with ADD have a higher rate of accidents, addictions, suicide, bankruptcy, divorce, illegal drug use and financial problems.
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Managing ADHD in the classroom requires a tight collaboration between the family, the teacher and the school administrators. Many people, including teachers, are not well educated about ADHD and some still have the prejudice that the child is lazy or a discipline problem. The fact is ADHD is a neurological disorder that can make every day tasks that are second nature to those without ADHD/ADD seem like an insurmountable task for those with ADHD.
 
The standard definition of ADHD includes three subtypes:

1. Predominantly hyperactive-impulsive
2. Predominantly inattentive
3. Combined hyperactive-impulsive and inattentive

The most prominent features of ADHD include:

1. An inability to control behavior or impulses.
2. An inability to delay gratification.
3. Excessive physical activity that is unrelated to the activity at hand.
4. Poor ability to sustain attention or to persist with tasks.
 
Each individual with ADHD is different with their own set of strengths and challenges. However, in addition to the hyperactivity or the inattentiveness, the ADHD child often has challenges in a group of skills called executive functions. According to Wikipedia, executive functions is a “concept used by psychologists and neuroscientists to describe a loosely defined collection of brain processes which are responsible for planning, cognitive flexibility, abstract thinking, rule acquisition, initiating appropriate actions and inhibiting inappropriate actions, and selecting relevant sensory information”.
 
Often with the ADHD child, the impairment is more than them being hyperactive or inattentive. Other possible ramifications or symptoms of the child with ADHD include challenges, limitations or problems with:

1. Organization

3. Memory recall of facts or concepts learned.
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